Often I’ve been in some powerful Storms that I didn’t think I could ever get out of. I would sometimes just curl up and cry wondering how I could ever survive it. I would question God why he was doing this to me!! I would hide behind a bottle or a drug making sure the pain didn’t show!!
Never really facing the pain that I had and was still enduring in these storms. I never knew a way to face them except through a bottle. So basically I avoided every storm that was happening & some were category 4 hurricanes. I would just pick up the vodka or whatever I could find & numb the pain. That’s all it did was numb & hide it. Never was I fixing it. I was just killing my body & it was a very slow & painful death.
When I say this I was truly pretty close to death. I weighed about 85lbs my blood alcohol had been over .40 I lost my job & my son was about to lose his Mom. It was time to get control of my life!
Yes I had to adjust my sail in the middle of a category 5 hurricane. I was going to die if I didn’t quit drinking that day! I got on my knees and asked God for his help & that’s what he did! I put the faith of a mustard seed in him & he started steering my vessel in the right direction.
Please don’t think that there aren’t still storms in my life. Because there are and some are life changing, but I’ve learned a better way of handling them & now I am in control of how I adjust my sail & carry on!!!
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